Springer (Sophie) showing off her supple sinew with a stretchy swirl! Again!
It's been 4 years since I published the The Stupendous Springer Episode 0! This may seem to be a minor thing, but honestly, I wrestled with my love of stretchy characters for over a decade, wrestling with guilt and self-doubt as I didn't understand why my brain liked them so much and yet I did not feel the same way about them as many do. Was I lying to myself? Was I broken and sinful? Did I consider people objects to be distorted and played with for my own amusement? So many ways to condemn myself, something my upbringing coincidentally made me very good at.
I've been through a lot since then, a lot more clarification, but in 2016, I wanted to try my hand at experimenting with my weird ideas. It didn't last, and in a fit of rage and self-loathing, I deleted my old DA account, the 2016 sketch with it, and also went back to destroy a lot of my old doodles notebooks, including my original doodles of the character who would be come Sophie, sadly. Eventually I made a new account but I didn't post anything until 2020. In the depth of the stress of the pandemic, I eventually had no more mental bandwidth left for self-condemnation, and decided I would just post my weird ideas and connect with people who liked them, and if that was a mistake, I would deal with it later.
It wasn't a mistake. I met some of the best friends of my life since then! Wonderful people who have helped me and who have given me the honor of helping them also. I better understand now why I felt so broken before (two spectra, which both start with a, probably play a major part), but the lesson was learned before then - I needed to let myself enjoy things. Life is too short to abuse yourself. This is the story I have lived, and it's the story I hope to tell with Sophie. I hope it will be the story many other people need to hear.
Here's to the next 4 years of developing this project! Not just the art, not just the story I plan to tell, but also the project of my own mental health and maturity. I am immensely grateful for those who have helped me along this path; they know who they are : )